Losing My Father

Lessons and Regrets

As an ICU & Palliative Care doctor, I've seen many patients pass away over the years. But losing my own father four years ago was a completely different experience. He passed away in Ghana while I was in Canada, and I wasn't able to be there with him in his final days. It was one of my biggest regrets, and it still weighs heavy on my heart.

Dealing with the loss was difficult. At the time, I was working a lot and focused on research and clinical activities. Looking back, I wish I had made more space for grieving. I wish I had taken the time to really process what was happening and allow myself to properly mourn the loss. It's important to recognize the weight of our emotions during times of grieving and to allow ourselves the time and space to feel them.

Losing my father was a reminder that life is short. It made me look at my kids differently and appreciate them even more. It also changed my perspective at work. When I see someone passing away, I can relate to what it's like to lose a loved one. It has made me more empathetic and compassionate towards my patients and their families.

One of the messages I often give is to be present. If you have the opportunity to be with your loved one, take it. If you need to travel back from a vacation or across the country to see them, do it. It's one of my biggest regrets that I wasn't able to see my father in his last days, and I don't want anyone else to have that regret. We should prioritize our time with loved ones because we never know when it will be our last chance to be with them.

Losing my father was a difficult experience, but it taught me the importance of cherishing the time we have with our loved ones. Life is short, and we should make the most of every moment. It's important to take the time to grieve and process our emotions, so that we can move forward with a greater appreciation for the people and experiences that make life worth living.